When I first became a mom, I didn’t realize what a huge undertaking it would be. The demands of motherhood are a full time job. Add to that homeschooling, working, friendships, errands, and life and many of us want to crash at the end of the day.
This leaves little for the most important relationship (outside of Christ) in our life-our husbands!
So, what can we do to keep our marriage strong despite the demands of motherhood? How can we survive marriage and motherhood? Here are some tips!
You may believe you don’t have time, but you do! It is a choice as to how you spend it. MAKE the time to SCHEDULE time with your spouse each and every day. This could be first thing in the morning, or in the evenings after the kids go to bed. This time to reconnect after a long day is crucial to any marriage.
Another important thing to do to strengthen your marriage is have regular date nights. These don’t have to be expensive! Consider putting the kids to bed early once a month and vegging out on ice cream while watching a redbox film. Play a game. Go for a walk. Do something you both enjoy! The key is making time to be together!
The toilet overflowed, the boy broke a lamp, and the kids fought all day. This is one I am SO guilty of. As soon as my hubby calls to tell me he is on his way home, I unload. That is NOT the way to do things. Yes, we know it happens to all of us!
But, how did his day go? I am sure there were stresses there too. You wouldn’t want him to unload as soon as he walks through the door, so have the same courtesy.
Who likes coming home to a messy house? No one! This includes your husband. Having a few things done before he gets home can go a long way to having a peaceful evening. Have the kids help you do a quick sweep of the house 30 minutes before dads due to arrive home. Sweep up the crumbs, pick up the toys, and clean off the counters. It doesn’t have to be great, but a 5 minute tidy can go a long way!
Motherhood puts us in the middle of messes, snot and mayhem. For many of us our “uniform” is a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. While I don’t think that is necessarily a bad thing, I do think it is important to freshen up a little bit before the day is through.
Consider putting on a clean t-shirt, dab a little makeup and lip gloss on, redo your messy bun, change into a pair of capris or jeans every now and then. You know what happen? You begin to feel better about yourself!
I tried this for a month, and now make sure to do it almost every day. You know what happened? I felt more receptive to my husband. I felt better about me. And, I didn’t feel like I had spent the day scrubbing toilets or wiping noses.
Being a mom does not mean you have to stop taking time for your marriage. A marriage is one of THE most important relationships in your life. It is the core of a family. We need to do more than survive our marriages, we need to make sure they are thriving!
How do you survive marriage and motherhood? Sound off in the comments!
PS: For more information on marriage and being a busy mom check out this book!
Janelle Knutson says
So very important to invest in our marriages! IHeidi’s book was excellent. Thanks for sharing your tips.